I am Sam

Farewell

2011-06-30T17:55:00.000+08:00

Well here it is, my last day in a company I detested for
the longest time. Actually, just 10 months, but still.

I've gone through my roughest patch with ben while
working here as an intern, survived a horrid director,
seen my manager leave, carrying their tasks, helping
my general manager with his letters..

I've contemplated lunches with devon on msn,
scheming horrible things and laughing at them. I've
gone to heng's table at least 5 times a day to discuss
the silliest things- from make up to blog stalking.

I've met ben during his breaks, or after his school
ends, and given him little kisses in between.

And now that I have a chance to leave, I am suddenly
afraid. I am afraid to lose the ties I have made, and forget
the things that I have done while here.

Even as I'm typing this while clearing my desk, I can
already feel memories seeping away from me. It's so scary.

But what is life without new chapters isn't it?
I have learnt so much here, and spent nights tossing and
turning over due projects and press releases etc.

Now it is time to go.

15 minutes more and I will never enter this office again.

500 days of Summer, 2 minutes of Paul

2011-05-26T10:04:00.000+08:00

I rewatched 500 Days of Summer yesterday, and I

realized something that I did not notice the first time

I watched the movie.

No one watched Paul.
(shall insert his face in case many of you ignored it)

At least, not me. Until yesterday, and the only reason
for that was because I was like, "HEYYYYYY that's
the guy I like from Criminal Minds!!!"

And that was about it. The rest of the time, I was more
concentrated on how heartbreaking it was that Tom
was being ditched like a sad bitch whilst Regina Spektor's

Hero played in the background.

*note to self: never play that song during a breakup, you

might as well dig your own grave and die.

Then it came to the last part. Probably the 400 something

day, and some of the dudes started talking about love,

and then Paul (the dude from criminal minds) said,

"I guess I just got lucky, um.. We met in Elementary School,
in 7th grade we had the same class schedule, and uh.. we
just clicked. You know, technically, the girl of my dreams
would probably have like, a really bodacious rack, you know
uh.. probably different hair.. and yeah, you know she'd probably
be a little more into sports. But um.. truthfully, Robin's better.
Robin's better than the girl of my dreams. She's real."

(MIND YOU, IT TOOK ME A LOT OF SEARCHING
ON GOOGLE FOR THIS FUCKING QUOTE. EVERYONE
ELSE ONLY CARES ABOUT HOW MUCH SUMMER
THOUGHT THEY WERE LIKE "SID AND NANCY". SO
I PAINSTAKINGLY WROTE DOWN WORD FOR WORD
FROM THE CB YOUTUBE VIDEO.)

Anyway, back to what I was saying, everyone was so focused on
the whole sadness of the story, that they did not notice this one happy
part.

There are guys out there, who do think you're way more beautiful
than you would give yourself credit for. And despite saying that
Jessica Alba's the best thing to happen to men, they never dare tell
you that you are the best thing that's happened to them.

I guess if I was in some shitfucked relationship, I'd have probably
cancelled that dude's voice out. No one's ever that lucky to have
met in Elementary School. But I know some people who've been lucky
to have met after they each divorced, or after their partner died.

So the point is, for those people who have cried buckets over the
loss of their "summer" and are looking for "autumn", I say please give
up all that drama.

Why not settle instead for someone like Paul?

Skincare

2011-05-24T09:32:00.000+08:00

As I think I have mentioned before, I would like to
set up a skincare blog. I am in the midst of it, and
I find that I have almost no time to set up a proper
template - hence, nothing has been actually done.

Or, should I say, nothing concrete has actually been
done. I wrote a few posts, got angry at how ugly
the blog looked, and then just put it aside.

I hope I do get back to it... sometime soon.

Wish me luck because I'm going to get meself a
niece come this June/July and I doubt I am going to
want to do anything else besides try to get her hand
to grasp my little finger and just looking at her chest
rise and fall as she sleeps.

I am so excited just thinking about her petal lips and her
bald scalp littered with a few fine strands of hair!

Oh I am so going to kiss the crap out of her face.
And body.

That sounded so wrong. I can imagine myself just
breathing deeply while watching over her cot and just
staring at her. Like some kind of psycho paedo stalker.

I AM GETTING A NIECE! A NIECE!
I have already been harrassing my sis-in-law's preggy
tums and calling out the baby's name (to get kicks in response!).

Too excited already. Cannot take it.

Okay I am going to stop here before I start sounding
like I deserve to be on criminal minds.

38 Days

2011-05-23T16:22:00.000+08:00

There's 38 days to go for me, and I really wish time
would fly by just a little bit quicker.

All this time, since I hit 20, I've found that time flies
by way faster than I need it to - hence, all these
unwanted fine lines, open pores, bad body aches,etc.

But no, once it comes down to waiting for months/days,
time just decides to be a bitch to me....

I'm waiting for 2 things now.

1) My boyfriend to get back
2) Somethinggggggggggggggggggg
(Which happens in 38 days)

And the 1st is already taking ages. He's only been gone
for 16 days but it feels like 2 months!? OMG I JUST
WANT HIM TO COME BACK SO THE 2ND
THING WILL HAPPEN FASTER!!!!!!!!!!!

Not sex.

I know you're thinking that, asshole.

But I don't have to wait 38 days for sex, since
Ben is getting back in 12 days suckers. I suppose
that was too much information...........

ANYWAY MY THEORY IS: After Ben gets back,
everything's going to go in fast forward.

Graduation, saying goodbye to my company, cutting
my hair... AND SOMETHING.

BEN CAN YOU JUST GET THE FUCK BACK!?

I know I'm only using him as a tool to get time to
pass faster (which I suppose works because we've already
hit one year and I don't even know that passed so fast!?)
but please understand I cannot wait any longer.

This post makes no sense except to those dearest to me.

I apologize for this shitfucked post.

Beauty is:

2011-05-19T17:44:00.000+08:00

It’s said the public relations department of a beauty products company asked its customers to send pictures along with brief letters, describing the most beautiful women they knew. Thousands of letters came in. One caught the attention of the employees and was passed on to the president.

It was written by a boy from a broken home who lived in a run-down neighbourhood. With lots of spelling errors, an excerpt from his letter read:

‘A beautiful woman lives down the street from me. I visit her every day. She makes me feel like the most important kid in the world. We play checkers and she listens to my problems. She understands me. When I leave she always yells out the door that she’s proud of me.’ The boy ended his letter saying, ‘This picture shows you that she is the most beautiful woman in the world, and one day I hope to have a wife as pretty as her.’
Intrigued, the president asked to see the woman’s picture. His secretary handed him a photograph of a smiling, toothless woman, well advanced in years, sitting in a wheelchair. Sparse grey hair was pulled back in a bun. The wrinkles that formed deep furrows on her face were somehow diminished by the twinkle in her eyes.

‘We can’t use this woman,’ said the president, smiling. ‘She would show the world that our products aren’t necessary to be beautiful.’

From Zooey Deschanel to Vogue

2011-05-18T12:27:00.000+08:00

Why would you want to limit the spectrum

of beauty to an "ideal" when you, as a

popular womens magazine, have the opportunity

to expand it? I don't think any woman should

have to feel as if she needs to shove herself into

an "ideal" to be beautiful. Beauty should be

something that is celebrated and something that

is enjoyable, not something that people should

feel uncomfortable about achieving. Most of

the women, and certainly most of the adolescent

girls, in the United States do not feel completely

secure with themselves, especially with their

appearance; is insecurity something you want to

advocate? As American women, we don't need

discouragement, but inspiration.

Pms

2011-05-18T12:23:00.000+08:00

It's just one of those days, where I wish I could
change everything about myself.

From looks, to thoughts, to everything else.

I should probably be bruised all over, with all the
self beating up that I do. But it's always the same.

I get sad, then I don't. Then I neaten my hair,
my clothes, check my make up in the mirror and
get along with life as per normal.

But sometimes I am so tired of being me.

I wonder if this will ever change; if I will ever change.

BLACKHEADS BE GONE!

2011-05-12T09:21:00.000+08:00

If blackheads are the bane of your existence,
like they are mine, I have some solutions for
you! :)

I never focused on them much before, until my
beloved decided to tell me my nose looked like
it was being raped like black ants.

Okay, not quite in that way but that's how I heard
it anyway hahaha.

So I decided, while the fucker is in USA, I'm gonna
get rid of the other little fuckers on my nose.

This is what I do:

1) Shower
2) Put on Mario Badescu's Silver Powder
3) Wait for 10-15 minutes
4) Wipe the Silver Powder off with toner
5) Put a nose strip on (optional. can use extractor too)
6) After either removing nose strip/finishing extracting,
I put on medication --> Off with Those Heads

Now the thing is, my blackheads are really in
love with my nose because they refuse to leave.

So if you're the kind with very superficial blackheads,
I would say warm water, an extractor and some
astringent will go a good enough way with you.

If you're like me, and have to SUCKKKK those bitches
out, I would say you NEED to get the silver powder.

You can even read this review:
http://regis.onsugar.com/How-de-junk-strawberry-nose-Picture-tutorial-10031523

The first time I used it, my blackheads literally ROSE
to the surface, and my charcoal colored nosestrip
turned white with dots. So freaky right.

After about 1.5 weeks after getting it, my nose strip is
only littered lightly in random and small patches! :)

And by small I mean TINY little dots!

Hope this helped, though probably no one reads this
anymore.

Ha ha.

2011-05-05T18:04:00.002+08:00

I am reading a skin care blog now on pores, and
it goes something like this:

"Since the skin care products on the removal of pores, pores are powerless, that we still need to make pores care? Answer is - very necessary!

Because Pore cleaner products can make the pores - so visual you can make your pores smaller, but this effect is based on your regular use of these products on the basis of.Skin care experts say: any effect is temporary, once you stop using the pore care products, your pores will return to their original look. "

LIKE WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?

Please do not write a blog if you cannot speak
or write proper English, thank you.

Romance

2011-04-28T10:41:00.002+08:00

is when you and your boyfriend talk like this:

Slut Baby

2011-04-28T09:19:00.005+08:00

Ever since I found out I'm going to have a niece,
I've been falling in love with babies everywhere*.

* - ugly/noisy/irritating ones not included

I've even started checking out cute baby items
like HERRO KITTEE HAIRBANDS!

Though Singapore, somehow, loves slutty girl
babies! I DON'T UNDERSTAND.

If the adults dress skimpily, then
"WAH SO SLUTTY! ASKING TO GET RAPED."

But if they're babies, Singapore actually sells onesies
or dresses with provocative words, or with irritatingly
bimbo "Spoiled <3" sayings all over the place.

And then expect parents to feel very happy about it.

YET!!! For baby boys, they have all kinds
of adorable onesies saying "BABY EINSTEIN!"
or "MR. HANDSOME". Perfectly decent and
sometimes rather arrogant...

But no, for baby girls, they have to be
"99% Trouble, 1% Angel".

Like what the fuck?

My cute little baby Jo is going to be 100% angel to
me, thank you very much. And by the way, Kiddy
Palace sells shit like that. It annoys me greatly.

I even want to hiss at parents who opt to dress
their baby girls with "juicy" on their ass.

Or like little stupid sluts at 3-6, showing off their
middriffs...

WHAT HAPPENED TO PRIM AND PROPER!?

By the way, I am no conservative person, but by all
accounts I think we should just let children be children.

There is so much time during their puberty to let
them be led astray into one night stands and whatever.

And at that time I'll probably pass Jo back to her parents
(haha suckers!). It is lovely to have no baby of my own.

2011-04-27T14:17:00.000+08:00

Omg this dancing rabbit is
making me laugh way more
than it actually should.

It's so funnily sexy!
And round!!!!!!!!!!

I just want to squish it to death.

RASHEZZZXZX

2011-04-25T10:13:00.001+08:00

DAY AND NIGHT.

DAY AND NIGHT.

RASHES RASHES RASHES.

RASHES ON MY FACE.

WHY NOT ON MY BACKSIDE?

WHY WHY WHY.

Damn fucking ugly.
I dislike how my face chooses to be
a bitch to me.

I wonder if this is karma for me being
a bitch to others.

STRESSED MAX

2011-04-21T14:53:00.003+08:00

Is it very possible to scream out from stress?

I suppose so.

I wish I could find some super high mountain and
just go there and scream like I'm in some D-grade
horror show.

But I think things will come down once Ben leaves
for the US of A for 3 weeks.

I'm gonna recover all the 'me' time we've both lost
since going almost a year into this relationship, and
just CALM THE FUCK OUT.

1) Less arguments.
Yes, happy couples have arguments too. They just
get pushed away faster, though sometimes I must
admit I am not the best at moving on.

Still, comprimise, and a bit of shutting up, and PRESTO!
All good to go.

But while he is busy buying stuff for me in Amellica, I
will brighten up any quarrels we have by thinking of
how guilty he would be = more presents.

2) Saturdays to Rest
It used to be that I got my rest on Sundays. But
ever since I found out about my wish to enter Lasalle,
(I use 'found out' because I never thought about it
much before) I decided to work my ass off at Jewelry
shows 2 Sundays a week.

Which led to Monday + Tuesdays feeling like shit.

3) A lot of $$ Saved
This is a bit of an uncertainty as the month of May
means 3 birthdays, 1 anniversary, and Mother's Day.
How much money will I save exactly? I will never know.

4) A lot of Beauty Sleep
Ben's nights will = my morning for 3 weeks. Means the
earlier I sleep, the earlier I can wake up feeling fresh and
talk to Ben before going to work! :)

5) A LOT A LOT OF SKIN CARE
I will splurge my growth dividend fund on some bloody
good (and lasting - though Fancl is awesome, 1 bottle
lasts 1 month, and really.. I'm not that rich) skincare.

I am gonna mask the fashizzle out of my face and blind
Ben with my radiance at the airport when he returns.

6) Trim + Treatment
Just because God knows my hair needs them both.

BUT FOR THE MONTH OF APRIL.

Wah, I cannot describe it.

As with all job promotions, it means jobscope expansion.

That means I've been working doubly hard (yes I am
typing this during work hours, sue me) and staying back
late the past few days.

2 more weeks and I'm home free!!!!!!!!!!!

No, I am also not very interested in going out often
if you think that's what's gonna happen while the bf's
away.

I am a lazy mouse, I do not go to play.

But you are welcome to my house anytime.

kuhrayzee weeks

2011-04-14T17:20:00.002+08:00

It's been hectic at work.

I seldom say it because I am a chill banana
while at my work desk, but WOW. This
world gourmet summit deal has gotten me
into overdrive.

I suddenly feel productive.

LOL.

Note: I seldom say LOL unless I really do feel
like I would burst out laughing. so..

LOL.

Haha, I find that phrase annoying actually.
Such a hypocrite right. Okay, what a waste of
time lingering on this.

Anyway. I have gotten my growth dividend
share, and now (with no approval from my boyfriend
because.. I don't feel like getting scolded)...

I have decided to buy this for myself:
(as an early birthday present!)

YAY ME! A happy sam is... a.. happy.. sam.

OKAY LA FUCK LA WHO CARES.

BTW if you're interested to know what it is, please
go google Clarisonic. I don't want to explain it here
in case I sound like a huge ass bimbo (if I don't already).

LOL.

Oops, I did it again.

digital love

2011-04-14T12:35:00.007+08:00

"I was shooting a scene in my new film,
No Strings Attached,
in which I say to Natalie Portman,

“If you miss me, you can’t text, you can’t email,
you can’t post it on my Facebook wall.
If you really miss me, you come and see me.”

I began to think of all of the billions
of intimate exchanges sent daily via fingers
and screens, bouncing between satellites and
servers.

With all this texting, emailing, and social
networking, I started wondering, are we all
becoming so in touch with one another that we
are in danger of losing touch?

It used to be that boy met girl and they
exchanged phone numbers.

Anticipation built.

They imagined the entire relationship before a
call ever happened.

The phone rang.

Hearts pounded.

“Hello?”

Followed by a conversation that lasted two hours,
but felt like two minutes and would be examined
with friends for two weeks. If all went well, a
date was arranged.

That was then.

Now we exchange numbers, but text instead of call
because it mitigates the risks of early failure
and eliminates those deafening moments of silence.

Now anticipation builds.

Bdoop.

“It was NICE meeting u.”

Both sides overanalyze every word. We talk to a
friend, an impromptu Cyrano:

“He wrote nice in all caps.
What does that mean? What do I write back?”

Then we write a response and delete it 10 times
before sending a message that will appear to care,
but not too much. If all goes well, a date will
be arranged.

Whether you like it or not, the digital age has
produced a new format for modern romance, and
natural selection may be favoring the quick-thumbed
quip peddler over the confident, ice-breaking
alpha male.

Or maybe we are hiding behind the cloak of digital
text and spell-check to present superior versions
of ourselves while using these less intimate forms
of communication to accelerate the courting process.

So what’s it really good for?

There is some argument about who actually invented
text messaging, but I think it’s safe to say it was a man.

Multiple studies have shown that the average man
uses about half as many words per day as women,
thus text messaging.

It eliminates hellos and goodbyes and cuts
right to the chase. Now, if that’s not male behavior,
I don’t know what is.

It’s also great for passing notes.

There is something fun about sharing secrets with
your date while in the company of others.

Think of texting as a modern whisper in your lover’s ear.

Sending sweet nothings on Twitter or Facebook is also
fun. In some ways, it’s no different than sending
flowers to the office: you are declaring your love for
everyone to see.

Who doesn’t like to be publicly adored? Just remember
that what you post is out there and there’s some stuff
you can’t un-see.

But the reality is that we communicate with every part
of our being, and there are times when we must use it all.

When someone needs us, he or she needs all of us.

There’s no text that can replace a loving touch when
someone we love is hurting. We haven’t lost romance in
the digital age, but we may be neglecting it.

In doing so, antiquated art forms are taking on new
importance. The power of a hand-written letter is greater
than ever.

It’s personal, deliberate, and means more than an email
or text ever will.

It has a unique scent. It requires deciphering.

But, most importantly, it’s flawed.

There are errors in handwriting, punctuation, grammar,
and spelling that show our vulnerability.

And vulnerability is the essence of romance.
It’s the art of being uncalculated, the willingness to
look foolish, the courage to say,

“This is me, and I’m interested in you enough to
show you my flaws with the hope that you may embrace me for
all that I am but, more importantly, all that I am not.”

— Ashton Kutcher

Mathy Movie Titles

2011-03-23T15:15:00.002+08:00

Answers are way down, in case you wanna spend some time guessing.

These are guesses, but they seem logical!

1: The Matrix
2: Signs
3: The Fireball, or Ball of Fire, or Great Balls of Fire
4: Duck Soup, or The Mighty Ducks
5: Cross of Iron, or Iron Man 2
6: A Man Apart, or A Man Alone, or Social Network
7: Sin City
8: Heat
9: GoldenEye
10: Beauty and the Beast, or Angels and Demons

How I feel today

2011-03-23T09:24:00.002+08:00

Woke up with swollen eyes dry skin and a frown.

Why the hell is it still Wednesday!?

I suppose if I really did put the effort in I could've finished
all my art pieces due for the Lasalle Interview this Friday.

But being me, as I always am, I decided to postpone
the event till the 8th of April. I hope I do not only pick
my pen up on the 6th of April, and then call Lasalle if
there's another slot open in May.

CURSE MYSELF!!!!!!!!

2011-03-18T10:48:00.002+08:00

someone save me from my lazinesssssssss.

please please.

its almost 11 and i have not started work.

yes, at all.

2011-03-18T10:39:00.000+08:00

"People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that's what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.

A true soul mate is probably the most important person you'll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then leave.

A soul mates purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life, then introduce you to your spiritual master..."

- Eat Pray love

2011-03-18T09:22:00.002+08:00

i think ben is getting old.

if i smsed this to him, he'd probably reply back,
"another time can? i got school tomorrow."

or "cannnn. but can you come to my house?"

like some old fat slug.

i realize by posting this i am revealing a lot.
but its my blog and i will write what i want to.

2011-03-17T09:38:00.002+08:00

My birthday is like.. soon.

Okay no it's 5 months away.

I want this. But in Peridot, for my birthstone.

Not a hint. Will sms this to ben now.

hahahahahah, poor guy.

So unsuspecting, sleeping at home.

Not knowing he will have to blow his pocket

apart soon ~~~

2011-03-17T09:10:00.002+08:00

Okay. Breakdown is over!

Everything back to normal now, folks.

Stocks are back up,
and the economy is fine.

Currency's also the same.

Hahahaha, don't know what I'm talking
about now. Which means I'm fine.

Everyone just needs a moment to implode
then explode.

tell you a secret

2011-03-16T09:58:00.002+08:00

i am a closet emo.

but not for these few days.

i've been going crazy in my head, and
have possibly cried more in 2 days than
i have the past 2 months.

that's saying a lot because i don't even
cry when ben and i have bad arguments.

its like some kind of breakdown.
some kind of hypocritical breakdown,
since i'm supposed to be the strong and
easy-going one.

i am sure i am going to lose it soon.

i just dont know when or how.

.
.

to all that's been affected by me:
i am sorry. please give me awhile.

2011-03-16T09:14:00.001+08:00

stefanie/- says:
* you know ah they drive lorry ya they can just ignore me.
* if he's driving a lambo
* or ferrari
* please just look

Sam Joy says :
* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

stefanie/- says:
* look all you want

- - -

morning entertainment from my new found close
friend who is so pretty ah peks keep checking
her out.

2011-03-15T17:10:00.002+08:00

TIRED

BEING

I'VE

HAD

ENOUGH

FOR NOW

BRB

MAYBE

My New Diet

2011-03-15T10:56:00.003+08:00

(click to expand)

For Blood type B's, this will be my new diet.

So exciting. Not.

Cannot even eat soba or peanuts. Or chicken.
KFC and Macs are my new enemies.

I guess now is a time as good as any to start!
Ben and I will have to look for new eating grounds.

Probably resort to Vegetarian Pizzas now.....

PS: I am already on a greentea + no-fried-food
diet so lets see how that worksssssssssss

Lent

2011-03-14T09:12:00.002+08:00

It's now the season of Lent, and since we are
all supposed to give up something we love,
I've decided to let go of fried food for this period.

Hopefully, with some further strength, I am
able to control my intake of it for the rest of the
year. Anyway, this is not meant to be some kind
of holier-than-thou-mind-washing-crazy-christian
post..

It's just that I realized something yesterday:

I was at church with Ben, and had to really rush
off at about 6.50 right after communion, and jump
into a cab, to meet my family for my Dad's birthday
dinner. And we were in a place new to me, so I was
unsure about the possibilities of getting a taxi.

Hence, I prayed for a taxi to be right outside church.
I prayed and prayed and prayed.

And do you know what?

When I left, there was a taxi outside church.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Parked in the parking lot.

So I technically got what I wanted.. but it
was not really what I intended to pray for.

But I walked for another 5 minutes, and a taxi
drove right past me! I thought it was a dead case
since I missed it, but Ben shouted, "EH TAXI!!!"

AND THE TAXI FUCKING REVERSED LA.

What are the fucking chances of that!?!?!?!

I don't know man, but it's gotta be some divine
intervention. Seriously. It was crazy.

And as I was thinking back on my eyeliner post,
something else hit me.

I used to pray to have someone, at times when I felt
so lonely. Yes, so there were guys who came and
went, but none of them stayed, probably because
I did not pray for that.. But the point is, I got tired of
praying for someone. Anyway, I was not ready to
open myself up.

Then one day it hit me, I would never find someone
until I opened my heart. So instead, I prayed for God
to open my heart. I prayed the same thing for about
a month.

And I met Ben.

Now, I'm not saying this will happen to everyone,
nor that the time frame is going to stay the same.

I'm just saying, that perhaps you might think you've
been praying for exactly that one thing, and that
it'd come out the way you intended to -> taxi (above).

When it doesn't, you tend to give up on your cause.

But again, God might not give you what you want;
instead... he really gives you what you need.

Perhaps it's not your prayer that he isn't answering,
just that you're asking for the wrong thing.

Maybe just think again, it might help.

Happy Lent everyone!

2011-03-11T09:13:00.002+08:00

I know this is pathetic, but I will write it.

This morning, before work, I stopped at the Raffles
City toilet to draw on my eyeliner before heading off.

That was at about 845.

However, at 10am, I discovered I could not find my
eyeliner in my makeup bag or my bag! I started
panicking (don't blame me, Maybelline stopped
production in Singapore already!) as Zara bought it
from Thailand and I have no others left!

Thus, after having some mild heart contractions, I
rushed off to Raffles City in search for it. I realized
about 1.5hrs had passed since, so I prayed it would
still be there. (yes I prayed quite hard ok.)

However, when I went to the toilet... it wasn't. :(

Disheartened, I went back to work and decided to
look through my stuff again.

AND THERE IT WAS. Hidden beneath some inner
folds of my bag!

I really did pray again to thank God for it okay.

I bet he was like "What a stupid thing to wake me up
from my sleep for... praying for an eyeliner."

BUT THERE YOU GO, IT HAPPENED.

I BLOGGED ABOUT IT. End of story.

2011-02-28T14:02:00.001+08:00

Hi, is there anything you'd like to ask me?

http://www.formspring.me/sammoojoy

I promise I will answer all questions, even stupid
ones. Except my answer may not be so pleasant.

xoxo

2011-02-23T15:13:00.002+08:00

When I get into Lasalle, there are a few
things I will have to promise myself:

1) I do not start becoming a pretentious
artistic douche

2) I do not start smoking (yes, this is
stereotyping, but it is what it is)

3) I do not start piling on mountainloads
of make up

4) I make friends I like being friends with,
rather than for the sake of not being alone

5) I do not become a workaholic and forget
about the people I love

6) I most definitely cannot forget the man
that I love

7) I do not lose my macbook pro

8) I do not lose myself.

2011-02-21T17:10:00.002+08:00

I always thought pretty girls had it easier.

I mean, the guys are always nicer to them,
they look nice in whatever shit they choose to
don on, they take careless photos and look
good, and they just seem to go through life
with much less trouble.

But recently it's come to my attention that
it doesn't matter how pretty or ugly you are,
life is never satisfactory til' you're satisfied.

I could be a 3/10, but if I'm grateful I'm alive,
my parents love me, I have $ to get through
the everyday, life is good enough for me.

Or I could be a 11/10, but hate the fact that
I still don't look like a model, or do not get to
spend as much as the next pretty girl, and
always wonder if my boyfriend's with me for
my looks. Doesn't sound too happy.

I think our parents had it right in the first place.

Life is what you make it to be.
Don't be pretty, be positive.

2011-02-18T10:24:00.002+08:00

I think the reason why I stopped wearing as
much make up as I used to (meaning about
90% less) is because I hated taking out my
make up at night and realizing I look nothing like
I did just a few hours ago.

Oh, also, laziness.

When I went for the Cleo photoshoot, they slapped
make up on me like no tomorrow. Literally,
i think if anyone licked my face they'd have died
from some kind of poisoning.

Anyway, I wiped off 95% of it after the shoot and the
remaining makeup left over was just enough to
last my day out. And it looked FUCKING GOOD.

Like all my scars and dark rings all disappeared
and all that was left was SK2 skin. I was like OMG
IS THIS MY SKIN!? and when I went home and
washed my face, I realized.. of course.. it was not.

Now I know how deceiving women folk can be!

... though now I am tempted, myself, to start
wearing makeup again. Like foundation, etc.

Good thing I've thrown most of my make up away
otherwise I'd probably have done some Bobo
the clown makeup the next day. IT'S SO HARD
BEING A GIRL.

DAMN ALL YOU MEN OUT THERE WHO KEEP
LOOKING AT HOT GIRLS. CAN YOU JUST LOOK
AT YOUR OWN GIRLFRIEND/WIFE, THANKS.

SAME TO YOU, JESSICA ALBA'S HUSBAND.
I AM WATCHING YOU.

2011-02-18T09:54:00.003+08:00

I have always wondered,
what if we could treat breakups as our loved
ones having passed away?

Sure, some breakups end badly, but maybe
we could imagine that they died of a heart

attack while getting extremely angry at us.

But I wonder, do people cling on harder when
it can never happen again in this life; or do
they cling harder when it can still happen?

It's all about the maybes, could bes, should bes.

Isn't it?

Just a thought after reading this:

Not meant to be emo anything, I really do

entertain random thoughts.

FRAUCKIN'ADDICTED

2011-02-18T09:13:00.005+08:00

Since the time my boyfriend introduced this to me,
which was.. (in.. October??) last year, I have never
stopped loving it.

I am serious, I can just sit on my bed and ignore
ben's calls/smses as long as I'm playing this game.
(FYI - if I'm ignoring ben, chances are high I'll also ignore
you; it's nothing personal, the game is AWESOME.)

So if you've an ipod touch/iphone just go fucking download
this game. Though please don't download it during exam
or project periods because your F is not my fault.

- - -

On another note, I just purchased this yesterday,
and have fallen in love with it already.

I have almost never ever talked about make up here,
so if you'd like, you can take my word for it.

It's $30, which makes way more sense then the Bobbi
Brown ones ($57) which I seem to keep going back to
even though they are, in comparison, not as awesome.

It (so far, for me) does not crease or make my fine
lines as obvious, and even though it is quite thick,
I find it blendable enough and looks very smooth!

The only thing is you probably have to use a bit of
loose powder on a brush to set it in. A foundation
pad kind of makes it cakey. Also, it has to be rather
heavy to cover your dark rings but if you blend it
well enough there should not be a problem!

It's not that I'm a make up pro, though with my collection
I really should be - this makes me a failure btw-, but
the concealer really seems to be doing it's job!

I am so happy I am actually blogging about it.

So if you're convinced enough, do go try a bottle for
yourself. Also, once again, do not blame if it does
not work out for you.

The bloody Bobbi Brown assistants swear their concealer
was the best thing that happened to them, but for me
not so much. It's all personal, so remember, do not
sue me.

2011-02-17T09:28:00.002+08:00

I can only hope that one day, I will
stop letting my inadequacies get ahead
of me.

For now, I think I'm still lagging behind.

I do not know how people are able to
not compare themselves to others,
I feel like it is a skill I will never pick up.

Spent a good 30 minutes yesterday
feeling sorry for myself, and I do not even
know why.

I wake up in a rather big bed, in a rather
big house, and use a rather big toilet.

I would say I am above average looking,
I have above average spending power, and
I have above average prospects for the future.

This lack of self esteem is LITERALLY killing
me from the inside.

LITERALLY
LITERALLY
LITERALLY.

I will stop sounding like an emo prick right
about
.
.
.
.
.
.

here.

2011-02-15T12:45:00.002+08:00

i spent valentines day as a single.

hahahahaha

i liked it too. very new feeling, i
normally spend valentines day
wishing i was not single.

proof that grass is always gonna be
greener on the other side. sad life.

hahahahaha

if ben reads this i am so screwed..

hi ben i love you.

2011-02-11T09:38:00.002+08:00

this is so not me, but:

i am so in love with you.

i promise this

2011-02-11T09:08:00.003+08:00

Last night, while having a talk with Mel,
I discovered what promises make people feel,
expect, want, desire. I remembered how they
made me feel 3-4 years ago, and how I felt when
they disappeared.

I am a firm believer now, that one should never
make promises that they can never keep.

I too, in turn, do not make promises I cannot keep.

So when you ask me to make a promise, and I hesitate,
please understand that it is not my unwillingness to
reassure you. But rather my concern of how you would
feel when I cannot measure up.

Because there's only one thing I can really promise
in this world, and that is I wish I could make all the
pacts I make come true.

But we know that time changes thoughts, which changes
hearts, which changes people.

How do I know the person making the promise to you
today, will be the same person 10 years later?

I suppose for now you will have to take my word for it,
and remember that if I do not keep it in a few years' time,
that the person I am today would not tolerate it.

That's the best I can offer.

would do this to my nephew/niece

2011-01-31T09:21:00.005+08:00

i'm going to do this except same thing, except
maybe modify it a little.

"whhhhhhhhhhere's the ugly person!"

and watch the baby unconsciously insult people.

Parents

2011-01-24T09:39:00.003+08:00

There are a few things I don't understand about
Parents. Okay, there are only two.

1) I do not understand why they assume, that
when you have a girlfriend/boyfriend in your room
and the door is closed, the worst thing that can
happen is that you guys are having sex.

Because if what you're worried about is cervical cancer,
pregnancy, HIV - then please teach your son about
condoms/sluts, and teach your daughter that there are
such things as:

a) cervical cancer vaccinations
b) morning-after pills
c) birth control options
d) she has a right to deny sex/to ask for a condom.

I mean, there are worse things to worry about.

Like maybe the couple is planning a robbery, murder,
or they're taking drugs.

I'm not complaining about not being allowed to close
the door, I'm just saying I do not why parents
always assume the worst to be sex. It could be worse.

Just Saying.

- -

2) I do not know why parents think that because
we ignore them/do not do what they as us to do,
we are actually not listening to them or we cannot
hear them.

So then they proceed to talk to us like we really
are deaf and tell us things like:

a) why the (whatever fuck name)'s child smarter
than you ah? Why he A but you A-?

b) why the CCB/LJ's child so good looking but you
not ah (WHICH BTW, IT'S YOUR GENES SO
THANKS AND FUCK YOU)?

I mean, just because we choose not to heed does
not mean we cannot hear.

I know people (or even myself), who have heard
so much about our looks - like maybe we are
fat/flat/ugly or have big noses/chubby lips/small eyes
- and we accept it and even make fun about ourselves
to our friends.

EG.
There's once I said I wanted to tattoo an airplane taking
off on my collarbone because my chest is like an
airport run way.

But at the end of the day, even after being with my
boyfriend for about 9 months, I still feel very very
ashamed of talking about bras/bikini tops with him. Or
I don't like changing in front of him despite him having
seen every part of me already.

It's these things that remain at a subconscious level
that neither us nor our parents realize. But it remains.

So if I ever had a chance, I suppose I would tell my
parents (though it's too late) that it would be much easier
to be happy with myself if they were happy with me too.

- -

That's about my thoughts for today.

For Mel

2011-01-19T16:18:00.004+08:00

I don’t want to be married just to be married. I can’t think of anything lonelier than spending the rest of my life with someone I can’t talk to, or worse, someone I can’t be silent with.

Mary Ann Shaffer

2011-01-19T16:09:00.003+08:00

- -

Marina Abramovic and her lover/collaborator
Ulay performing “Death Self”.

This performance consisted of the two artists seated
in front of each other, connected at the mouth. They took
in each other’s breaths until all of their available oxygen
had been used up. The performance lasted only 17 minutes,
resulting in both artists collapsing unconscious to the floor,
having filled their lungs with carbon dioxide.

This personal piece explored the idea of an individual’s
ability to absorb the life of another person, exchanging and
destroying it.

2011-01-19T16:00:00.003+08:00

Just a heads up:

for those who used to read this blog for humor,
I am afraid that there is very little left, or there
will be on this site.

It's my year as a 21 year old (which will effectively
end in August) but I hope to begin a better life
and one with more direction by the time I am 22.

So a lot of times here, I will be posting just most
of my thoughts. The only thing that will be consistent
to my previous posts, is that they will be random too.

If you'd like to follow me through this period of
my life, do carry on reading. But if not, it has been
fun entertaining you for the past 2 years.

xx

black/white/grey/navy/nude

2011-01-19T15:54:00.001+08:00

Minimalism is not a style, it is an attitude, a way of being. It’s a fundamental reaction against noise, visual noise, disorder, vulgarity. Minimalism is the pursuit of the essence of things, not the appearance.

Massimo Vingelli

heartache

2011-01-14T17:46:00.004+08:00

You know, I sometimes wonder what it takes
to give "proper relationship/love advice."

Some people like to hear very long winded
stories, those with morals at the end or
some kind of epiphany.

Some don't like to hear anything at all, and
just prefer holing themselves up in a room
and supposedly emerging stronger than before.

But for me, I would say the best piece of
advice that I ever received was about a sentence
long, and it was the simplest thing.

It was also the only thing that made sense;
and it goes like this,

"If you're in a relationship, you should be
waking up happy almost everyday; why be
with someone who makes you sad?"

I feel like a lot of people are going to have a lot of
excuses after hearing things like that, but don't.

Just rationalize it out and you'll see it'd save you.

A little insight can actually make things right.

(that's not to say leaving is an easy thing to do.
it's difficult, but at the end of the day, it's better to
go through a hard patch than remain in it.)

- - -

PS - I'M VERY X 200 HAPPY IN MY RLTNSHIP
SO PLS DON'T GET WRONG IDEAS K HAHA.

JUST FELT LIKE NOTING THOUGHTS DOWN.

Lack of understanding

2011-01-13T08:49:00.000+08:00

Silence settled over the room. The student from the
Women's Center looked uneasy. "You're in a cult?"

Langdon nodded and lowered his voice to a
conspiratorial whisper.

"Don't tell anyone, but on the pagan day of the Sun God
Ra, I kneel at the foot of an ancient instrument of torture
and consume ritualistic symbols of blood and flesh."

The class looked horrified.

Langdon shrugged. "And if any of you care to join me,
come to the Harvard Chapel on Sunday, kneel beneath
the crucifix, and take Holy Communion."

The classroom remained silent.

Langdon winked. "Open your minds, my friends.
We all fear what we do not understand."

Dan Brown, The Lost Symbol

- - -

‎"I contend that we are both atheists. I just believe in one
fewer god than you do. When you understand why you
dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why
I dismiss yours."

Stephen Roberts

2011-01-11T11:38:00.002+08:00

Currently, while back at work, I've come
to a realization that staying here is akin to
staying in a rather abusive relationship.

Just the other day, I was thinking about why
people stay in marriages that they clearly
would rather not be in, or continue to date
or be with people they rather kill than spend
another second with.

And it suddenly occurred to me that the
biggest reason is comfort.

Yes, there are days where nothing feels better
than walking out and leaving it all behind,
or just buying a gun from any possible place
and shooting yourself/that person.

Then there are also days where you convince
yourself that it's really NOT THAT BAD or
even that there are certain times where you
actually even feel happy!

But I think it's just the fear of having to start
again or going through another strenuous
routine of looking for another person (in my case,
a job) and possibly even finding him/her even
worse than the person you're already with!

Hence: comfort.

True, times may get shitty. But then you've
already accustomed yourself to it over a
certain time frame, and you'd rather feel
indifferent than feel hopeful and then realize
your hopes can just go to shit again.

Am I supposed to get out of the frying pan and into
the fire? Or burn in here for all eternity?

What happy thoughts for a Tuesday morning haha.
The weather today is 24 degrees but here I am
in a fucking cubicle with a fucking flu.

I can just vomit out all my unhappiness now.

2011-01-03T14:50:00.002+08:00

I am a perfectionist.

I believe what I look like, what I have,
what I do, what I create is never good enough.

My father told me that to be a true artist
I have to always surpass my own limits.

I am not afraid to better myself, since I never
believe what I have is actually acceptable.

What I worry about is being better than others.

Insecurity may be what is needed for improvement,
but I feel it is the downfall to success as well.
More importantly, my own success.

I think I have to believe that I am a certain level
of good, to become another level of better.
And now that 2011 has started, I feel like I have to
finally do something to get to the eventual destination
that I have in mind for my future.

I don't have many resolutions this year. Or any,
I'm not sure. But if there's one thing I have to get done
in the span of the next 12 months is to finally get on
track to determining what the rest of my life is going
to look like.

I will never forget

2010-12-21T13:16:00.004+08:00

What we are
What we were
What we were like
What we do like
What we like to do
What we do together
What we want to be
and What we will become.

I will never forget you.

You are my Christmas gift to me.

2010-12-14T17:44:00.001+08:00

This is exactly how I feel about people who use
asterisks to "cover up" their vulgarities.

Because, oh wow, from Shit to Sh*t, there's a
world of difference.

Christmas List

2010-12-10T14:52:00.006+08:00

I know no one really comes here anymore.

BUT if you did, and wanted to buy me an Xmas
present, here's a list. I'm putting it for whoever
is desperate and out of ideas, and for me to
remember what I want to buy when I get the $.

haha, WIN-WIN.

1) Estee Lauder advanced night repair eye cream

2) A new Prada Wallet (blue/black is fine)

3) Smashbox Halo Loose Powder in Fair

4) Earrings that are ALLERGY PROOF
- best stainless steel/gold thanks.

5) A new bag. Preferably camel brown/black/blue
This is the Alexa Mulberry Bag if you wanted to know.

I am sure I want more things.......... Though none
are really coming to mind.

(Ps. if you notice, everything's in pretty monotone-ish
colors. Blue/black/brown/grey.. get most things in
those colors and you're good to go!)

My own boyfriend's making me a paper mache.

I knew I should've said yes to Emma Watson when
she asked me out for that date. (-> previous post)

2010-12-10T14:36:00.004+08:00

I had the weirdest dream last night.

THE WEIRDEST.

And it's all because of this picture of Emma Watson
that I saw on Tumblr where, once again, she looks
gorgeous.

Here it is!

The script supposedly goes like this (it's an interview):

Interviewer:
You are an incredible actress because you manged to make
people believe that a woman like you would be deeply in love
with a man with ginger hair.

Emma:Oh I think Rupert is gorgeous! He’s totally gorgeous.
He’s very handsome.

But I digress.

My dream was that I was a guy and Emma Watson asked
me to go to a movie premiere as her date but apparently I said
no because I was busy and she was quite upset.

And I did not know how to comfort her so I told her to ask
Rupert (haha, as though we're on first-name basis).

(Do not know why the fuck I would ever do that. As it is, I'm
a chick and could never ever dream of saying no to her!!!!!)

Anyway later on I asked her to go with me and she already
said she was going with Daniel (Radcliffe). Heartbreak.

.
.
.

Yeah so that's about it. Oh yeah if you wanted to know, she
asked me to be her date while I was taking the train back
with her sending her home (which was Holland V. Ha....)

And in the dream I kept wanting to call her Hermione.
So it went like "Her..emma." "Herma" or "Emione".

I woke up and all I could think about was Emma Watson.

It felt a bit like I was two-timing... hahahaha. Weird.

That's about it. I don't mind dating her though.
By don't mind I mean I'd die to date her.

Just to be clear haha.

$.$

2010-12-07T10:19:00.002+08:00

I have a love-hate relationship with Christmas.

I love the atmosphere, the cool air, the presents.

I hate the rain (when I'm at work), the $ flying,
the most probably weight gain, and secondary
school children milling about being useless in town.

But I was kind of hoping they'd start playing
Christmas songs already, which has not really
happened.. work is still playing crap ass songs from
the radio.

And on that note - I did not know Simple Plan
still exists. What the hell? They're all probably 30-40
already, and singing stupid teenage songs like
I Can Wait Forever.

Another day without you with me
Is like a blade that cuts right through me
But I can wait , I can wait forever

When you call my heart stops beating
When you're gone it won't stop bleeding
But I can wait, I can wait forever

Even Taylor Swift doesn't sound as pathetic.
Despite the fact she sings about running away with
married men.. or those about to get married...

Hmmm.

Okay I may have to revise what I just said.

Back to Christmas! I have a list of stuff to buy for
people - I'd be effectively (if I bought them all)
600+ poorer................................................................

Suddenly feel a bit sad.

It's 11am and I've already finished all of my work for
today.. I will once again get $64 today for doing nothing.

make up

2010-12-03T17:26:00.003+08:00

To make up for my lack of posts every month,
I will try putting something useful here.

Oh I know!

I have twitter now, much to my chagrin.
My colleague made me sign up for it, so if you'd
really like to see the crap I write, do follow me
at: sammoojoy

TADA!

Peer pressure is terrible. I don't even know what
I'm possibly going to write, nothing I think of
is even that follow-able, but do go ahead! haha

Hmmm.. what else......... You know I think with
twitter I may just shut down this space. I really
haven't had the time or energy to pen down
my thoughts. I go home, I shower, do masks, read
Harry Potter, occasionally talk on the phone,
snack.... watch tv... yeah..

Plus after looking at the screen all day, the last thing
I want to do is look at another computer.

Oh btw, I've been listening to Power 98 FM the
past 3 months, and all I can say is their song of
the week or month always pisses me off.

The new one is Ke$ha's We R Who We R song
and I feel like it actually depletes my IQ. Cannot
explain why, but maybe because it has this stupid

"DJ turn it upupupupupupup" shit part which
always gets me frustrated. I know no one else possibly
feels the way I do (I always get called weird)...
but still feel like sharing. So please don't ever
recommend this song to me. Thanks.

27 minutes more before I run road!

USS

2010-12-03T16:55:00.001+08:00

In the past few months, the only thing I can really
say I've learnt is that relationships are no joy ride.

In fact, the whole idea is kind of like Universal
Studios Singapore.

1) You see the pictures people take when they're in
it, you wanna get a taste of it too. So you go visit
the place and wonder why it looked so much better
in photos.

2) You hear about all the awesome rides, and you
go in it thinking about sitting the awesome rides
and then realize there's such a thing is queues,
humid weather, and expensive ticketing.

3) Hearing about it is better than experiencing it.

Yeah that really sums it up.

I suppose this post doesn't sound too positive!

But I'm not about to sugarcoat anything lah,
they are a pain in your ass. And until you learn to
make that pain into an orgasm, it's a ride to take.

However, that aside, I've been good!
I would like to say this post is merely an observation
so please don't assume anything emo from it! :)

I will, however, now bring Ben to USS just so I can
go to the souvenir shop.

Talking so much about that place has just got me
dying to go! I heard tickets are cheaper after
6.30 - 7pm if you just want to go to the shops and
restaurants!

Yes that's about it. TGIF!

2010-11-04T17:16:00.002+08:00

Just to mention, this article is not formulated from
my thoughts. I stole it from a good friend, who's
also a genius (in my opinion).

- - -

Do you know the difference between:

1) Nice vs. Good
2) Naked vs. Nude
3) Pain vs. Suffering

1) A child molester can be 'nice' to
a lost child.

A good person will help find the parents.

Bottom line: Don't be nice. Be good.

2) Those hand-chiseled marble statues at
renown museums aren't called 'naked' statues.

'Naked' is stepping into the shower.

Bottom line: Naked is on the surface and
scrutinizing. Nude deals with the concept
of masculinity and femininity.

3) Not wearing your helmet and smacking
your head against the pavement during a fall
is pain. A break-up can be painful.
Death of a family member or friend is pain.

... Suffering is the brain damage that follows
the fall. Suffering is wishing the break-up
was less ugly. Suffering is never finding the
body, regretting those last words.

Bottom line: A lesson learnt is a lesson learnt.
Every one of us must go through pain, but no
good soul should ever suffer.

2010-11-02T14:23:00.002+08:00

I miss my eyebrows. I miss my eyebrows.

I wish I had my caterpillar eyebrows again just
so I can pluck them properly. They got so fucked
in China that now they're perpetually out of shape.

I always liked the korean eyebrows! They're so
squarish and nice and short. Which fit my round
face! Unlike these weird pencil thin lines that
my eyebrows somehow always seem to get shaped
into now.

I'm at work, doing everything but my work.

Clearly.

I want to write something meaningful, but I don't
know what.

I've been a happy little beeeee as of late.
Besides the matter of my eyebrows, and my perpetual
dry skin that doesn't seem to go away...........

That's about it. Have a good Tuesday.

2010-10-07T16:36:00.001+08:00

"有一个精神病人，以为自己是一只蘑菇，于是他每天都撑着一把伞蹲在房间的墙角里，不吃也不喝，像一只真正的蘑菇一样。
心理医生想了一个办法。有一天，心理医生也撑了一把伞，蹲坐在了病人的旁边。病人很奇怪地问：你是谁呀？医生回答：我也是一只蘑菇呀。病人点点头，继续做他的蘑菇。
过了一会儿，医生站了起来，在房间里走来走去，病人就问他：你不是蘑菇么，怎么可以走来走去？
……
医生回答说：蘑菇当然也可以走来走去啦！病人觉得有道理，就也站起来走走。
又过了一会儿，医生拿出一个汉堡包开始吃，病人又问：咦，你不是蘑菇么，怎么可以吃东西？医生理直气壮地回答：蘑菇当然也可以吃东西呀！病人觉得很对，于是也开始吃东西。
几个星期以后，这个精神病人就能像正常人一样生活了，虽然，他还觉得自己是一只蘑菇。
其实……
一个人可以带着过去的创伤继续，只要他把悲伤放在心里的一个圈圈里，不要让苦痛浸染了他的整个生命，他就可以像正常人一样快乐地生活。
当一个人悲伤得难以自持的时候，也许，他不需要太多的劝解和安慰，训诫和指明，他需要的，只是能有一个人在他身边蹲下来，陪他做一只蘑菇。"

- - -

"There was once a mentally ill man who thought he was a mushroom.
Thus, everyday, all he did was hold an umbrella up and squat in a
corner of a room. He did not want to eat, he did not want to drink
- basically he also acted like a mushroom.

Finally, the psychiatrist, after thinking for a long while, came up with
an idea to help him.

He, too, took an umbrella and squatted in the corner of the room beside
the man.

The man felt weird, and asked, "Who are you?"
The doctor replied, "I am a mushroom too."

The man nodded, and continued on acting like a mushroom.

After awhile, the doctor got up and walked around.

The man asked, "Hey, you're a mushroom.
How come you can walk around?"

The doctor replied, "Mushrooms can walk around too!
Didn't you know?"

The man thought for awhile, agreed, and started walking about too.

After awhile longer, the doctor started eating a hamburger.
The man stared on, and asked again,

"You're a mushroom, why are you eating?"

The doctor very confidently answered,
"Mushrooms have to eat to survive as well! Didn't you know?"

The man found this to be true too, and so he started to eat.

As weeks went by, the man started to behave like a human, even
though deep inside he thought he was a mushroom.

The moral of the story is:

All of us are mentally ailed by something. Be it thinking of ourselves
as a mushroom, a broken heart, a wound that wouldn't heal or a scar.
Still, we eventually learn to get along and act as per normal, because
we've learnt to keep this hurt in a part of ourselves that's well kept
away, so as to not let it affect our everyday lives.

Not all of us are able to return to daily life as quickly, or as well as
others can though.

But perhaps what is needed is not words of advise or comfort.

Maybe, very simply, all that is needed is for someone to sit down, and be
a mushroom with us."

what chicken nuggets are made of

2010-10-06T09:42:00.005+08:00

"There's more: because it's crawling with bacteria,
it will be washed with ammonia, soaked in it, actually.
Then, because it tastes gross, it will be reflavored
artificially. Then, because it is weirdly pink, it will be
dyed with artificial color ."

Oh yes why it's long and stringy is because the chicken's
mechanically smashed --> later seperated into goop.

I will... never eat... McNuggets again..

NOT.

I will still eat that shit, because it tastes good.
And anyway I don't intend on living that long.

2010-10-01T09:39:00.004+08:00

you and me, we've seen everything to see
from bangkok to calvary. and the soles of
your shoes, are all worn down; the time for
sleep is now.

but there's nothing to cry about,
cause we'll see each other soon.

if heaven and hell decide that they both
are satisfied, illuminate the 'no's on their
vacancy signs. and if there's no one beside
you when your soul embarks

i'll follow you into the dark.

2010-09-30T14:00:00.003+08:00

1910-2008

A 98 year-old german woman named Irena Sendler
recently died.

During WWII, Irena worked in the warsaw ghetto as a
plumbing/sewer specialist.

Irena smuggled jewish children out; infants in the
bottom of the tool box she carried and older children
in a burlap sack she carried in the back of her truck.

She also had a dog in the back that she trained to
bark when the Nazi soldiers let her in and out of
the ghetto. The soldiers wanted nothing to do with the
dog, and the barking covered the kids’ and infants’ noises.

Irena managed to smuggle out and save 2500 children.

She eventually was caught, and the Nazis broke both
her legs, arms and beat her severely. Irena kept a record
of the names of all the kids she smuggled out and kept
them in a glass jar buried under a tree in her backyard.

After the war, she tried to locate any parents that may
have survived and reunited some of the families. Most had
been killed. She helped those children get placement into
foster family homes or adopted.

Last year Irena was up for the nobel peace prize.

She was not selected.

Al Gore won - for a slide show on global warming.

- - -

Really makes you wonder what people find important.

2010-09-21T10:23:00.002+08:00

I decided to use the time at my office to keep my
blog alive, since when I get home I absotootly refuse
to turn on my computer.

(Besides when I have a song stuck in my head and have
to download it before I go crazy.)

I had the weirdest dream last night, that I was going
to join cheerleading again. And I was so excited.

I don't know what the fuck I was excited for.
I'm sure if I tried one more backflip I'd hear bones
crack, and if I actually danced for more than 10
minutes my legs would break into spasms.

I've disintegrated into rubbish.

Just the other day, I did nothing but sit down cross-
legged for 20-30 minutes and I could not stand up after.
Or I could.. with difficulty.. and some sort of pain.

I'm so sure if I did any kind of dance again I'd
probably enter the ICU. Which is mildly depressing...

Where are the days I used to be able to run 2km
without feeling like a smoker, or the days I managed
to stay in the sun without feeling like a ninny?

......................................I should stop making fun of
fat people, I may have to hang out with them soon.

2010-09-21T10:22:00.000+08:00

“I’m standing on the moon with
nothing left to do, with a lovely view
of heaven but I’d rather be with you.”

2010-09-20T13:06:00.002+08:00

I understand that I am a girl but I really
have no clue about what girls talk about.

Or how they communicate at all.

I was once forced to count the number of
close female friends I have, and I could count
it on my fingers (of one hand). 2 of which were
my cousins and thus were forced to be cancelled
out.

Which is just balls really. I was from an all girls'
school!!!!!! This problem really plagues me.....

Why can't people have more sons, then maybe
I could have more friends.

Okay that was a rubbish sentence.

But I still think it's true.

2010-09-16T14:31:00.002+08:00

"It always fascinated me how people go
from loving you madly to nothing at all, nothing.

It hurts so much.

When I feel someone is going to leave me,
I have a tendency to break up first before I get
to hear the whole thing.

Here it is.

One more, one less. Another wasted love story.

But I really love this one.

When I think that its over, that I'll never see him again
like this... well yes, I'll bump into him, we'll meet
our new boyfriend and girlfriend, act as if we had never
been together, then we'll slowly think of each other
less and less until we forget each other completely.

Almost.

Always the same for me.
Break up, break down. Drink up, fool around.

Meet one guy, then another, fuck around.
Forget the one and only.

Then after a few months of total emptiness start again to
look for true love, desperately look everywhere and after
two years of loneliness meet a new love and swear it is
the one, until that one is gone as well.

There's a moment in life where you can't recover any
more from another break-up.

And even if this person bugs you sixty percent of the time,
well you still can't live without him.

And even if he wakes you up every day by sneezing right
in your face, well you love his sneezes more than anyone
else's kisses. "

Amen

2010-08-19T22:28:00.002+08:00

Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray the Lord my soul to keep.

Four corners to my bed;
Four angels there aspread.
Two to foot and two to head,
and four to carry me when I'm dead.

If any danger come to me,
Sweet Jesus Christ deliver me.

And if I die before I wake,
I pray the Lord my soul to take.

XXI

2010-08-14T15:48:00.001+08:00

For me, it's not about being rich.

Of course, who would mind if they were?
Its a gloriously predictable desire.

I'm not going to deny that I have been
brought up in a comfortable environment. Am I
rich? No. Am I well to do? Not really.

But I've definitely had my fair share of wealth.
Not purely on monetary terms, but in the people
I've met (both bad and good) and the way things
have turned out for me.

I am going to turn 21 soon, so I decided to do
some soul-searching body-thinking.

If I look back now, what are the things I'd regret?
I'm going to say 'nothing'. Both a cliche and a
truth.

I needed the heartbreaks, I needed the friendships
lost, I needed the lessons learnt, and I needed the
quarrels made to become who I am today.

I am:
1) so lucky to have those who stayed by me, remain
at my side. (Ling, Zara, Jem, Chip, XF, Sherry, the Ks).
Mostly because I am a difficult person, with a terrible
temper.

2) grateful to finally grasp the concept of unconditional
Love, taught to me by my family.

3) a graduate from a sucksballs school, that has more
than anything else, taught me about life over hospitality.

4) in love. With someone I never knew could make me
this happy, this brave, this strong.

And to these people I owe them my life, but at this
measly age with no income, I will first offer them my
heart.

It has been a great 2010 so far, but it can only get better.

At least till I turn 22, and start sobbing over the
increment of candles on my cake.

Font Family

2010-08-04T05:16:00.004+08:00

I want this book.

I watched a guy read through this on the
train yesterday, actually I watched him
flip the pages as I stared on like a pervert.

By stare on I mean at the artwork not the dude.

People should never stare at guys who look at art,
because they are either too rich for you, too gay for
you (unless you're a guy), too stuck up for you, or too
ugly -- because they rather draw than shower.

ANYWAY!

If you can get it for me (by you I mean people
I expect to see on/for my burthday), that
would be good.

I even got you some sites!

1) http://www.artsndesignbook.com/new%20titles%20Jan%20-%20Feb%202010.html

2)http://www.indexbook.com/libro.php?984

But I reckon KinoKuniya has it too, if you search
real hard.

Okay I think I'm gonna end up buying the blasted
book myself anyway.

Happy Birthday to Me

2010-07-29T20:52:00.002+08:00

Eh hi.

I've only slept 6 hours in 2 days for Tuesday
and Wednesday. I am pretty impressed with
myself that I actually pulled through a 9-9
day on Wednesday without dying out halfway.

Anyway, I figure it'd be awhile till I come back
to write again, probably right before my birthday
or right after.. who knows... even I don't.

God this blog has really gone to the shits.

But if you still read it, lemme update you on some
things:

1) My habit breaking deal is a GO. I'm on day..20!
Which means almost 3 weeks! 2 more weeks to go
approximately!

2) I'm very broke and I still have so much to buy.
I've lived with a pitiful amount of makeup remover
for the past week, and yesterday I officially ran out
so I scrubbed my face with a towel. It's terrible.. I know.

3) I'VE GOT MY INTERNSHIP. FROM AUG-DEC 2010
I WILL BE AT NAUMI'S CORPORATE OFFICE DOING
GRAPHIC DESIGN WORK. WOO! Not very hospitality
related but to fuck with it.

4) My dad's given me a $1.3k cap for my birthday
present. SO MANY IDEAS.

Yeah that's about it.......................... I think.

Oh by the way, if you got through the updates, I'll
leave a list here of what is safe to buy me for my
birthday. For those who bought me tech-related stuff,
I'd say this is the end of a beautiful friendship.

For THE REST WITH POTENTIAL:

1) A MiuMiu/Prada wallet (preferably pink/black)
(this can be a joined effort -- I accept haha.
Weeki/Jeremy, here is looking at you <3 <3 <3 )

2) Face stuff
--> Kiehl's (Dark eye rings remover!)
--> Face Shop (Masks)
--> Anna Sui (Pressed Powder shade 2)

3) Clothes are always good (if you know my taste)
Safest colors: Black, White, Blue, Grey, Nude

4) Perfume
--> Dolce and Gabbana Light Blue
--> Gucci Flora
--> Estee Lauder 5th Avenue
--> Marc Jacobs

5) Bring me shopping --> safest option.
Best results.

Yeah that's about it lah. I know some people will
be all politically correct/damn gross and write stuff
like "All I want for my birthday is to be happy."

But if you bought me what I asked for, I'd also be
happy! Tomayto-tomahto. So let's all be honest here.

Anyway enjoy shopping (for me)! Mwah.

2010-07-14T20:32:00.002+08:00

What my wardrobe looks like.

Ok there's more clothes, but the color range really only

extends this far.

So sad.

What's even more sad is how I looked at all the clothes

hanging and decided I'd definitely wear all of them.

My style is really some kind of monotone delight.

I've actually got my eye on a Prada right now, but my

money's more like up my ass.

$_$

Siansation rules the nation.

Blink

2010-07-09T21:14:00.002+08:00

I have been away from 1 month.

I feel like I've been cheating on my blog.
Like I've run off and left my blog in some
super sorry state. It's true. I don't even dare
type my blog into any computer because I
don't want to feel the guilt of having left it
dead like a 50 year old ugly wife.

I don't know how men cheat and still go home
feeling A-Okay. I wouldn't be able to face the
lady at all, without feeling the need for guilty sex.
Which may or may not be good.

Much like this feeling here, where the moment
I visit my blog, I have to do something. So
here I am, once again, writing about nothing.
And pissing both me, and the reading party off.

Wow it really sounds like how guilty sex would
make people feel.

Anyway, recently I've decided to stop a habit.
It's a bad one, and an obvious one.. so I decided..
you know what? It's been 13 years so I'm going to
stop this shit now. Apparently, on Wikianswers, it
takes approximately 3-5 weeks.

Of course, this excludes smoking or drug taking.
Just normal everyday habits like biting nails or
chewing hair.

And while reading up on it, I also looked at Yahoo
Answers and I was fucking irritated by the kind of
douchebag answers that were posted up.

Eg.
"How long does it take to stop a bad habit?"

Fucker A says,
"Takes a second to make, takes forever to break."
(fuck your mother lah, cb lousy answer.)

Fucker B says,
"Determination and strong will takes only a second."
(second your lanjiao. like that everyone can win the olympics
already.)

Fucker C says,
"It depends."
(no shit sherlock. fuck your mother also.)

It was extremely frustrating!!!!!! Why do these people decide
on giving the most annoying answers? I've decided that,
should any of these murfuckers be a doctor, they'd be the
worst around!

Patient: "How long do I have to live when I have HIV?"

Fucker A: "Takes a minute to shoot, takes a few long
painful months before you kapoot."

Fucker B: "Pain and suffering takes only 6 months."

Fucker C: "It depends." (because this is always the
worst answer ever. Especially in circumstances of "do
you love me?")

I know it sounds very angsty, but I honestly don't see how
anyone would appreciate such lousy answers/information.

Well anyway, just for anyone's interest in the matter, I'm on
to my second day now. So hopefully when I reach day 30,
which is... 28 days from now, I'd have gotten rid of the habit.

Which means I'll probably be away (again) for another 28
days. SORRY! I have other things/people to do.

Son of a Beach

2010-06-14T23:19:00.001+08:00

FOR LING!!!!!!! Hehehehe!

I am everywhere, but nowhere!

2010-06-13T12:00:00.003+08:00

My driving test is tomorrow.

I am feeling very antsy, very kanchiong
spider, very sticky the stick insect.

(see what I did there, grouped the insects all..
hahahaha, probably not going to get laid for a
few months just because of that.)

ANYWAY!

I scored 6 points for my assessment yesterday.
My dad's all up on me about the whole confidence
deal. He insists that I've got to have confidence.
Which is true that I've got none.

I can only conclude, after living 20 years of my
life, that the only thing I am TRULY DEFFO
confident about is giving impromptu speeches.

I am awesome at it. So awesome, I could give 10
reasons why Jim Sturgess should marry me, and his
secretary will be calling me 2 seconds later.

But for everything else....... I have serious doubts.

I also have serious amnesia (as of late). I've been
losing track of dates, assignments, exams, tests.. etc.
I am really losing it. I wonder if things are going to
get any better anytime soon.... but I also have serious
doubts about that too.

There are just about a few things left on my to-do
list for this year, and those are:

1) Get an internship deferment
2) Get my tattoo
3) GET MY FUCKING DRIVING LISCENSE
4) Beg God not to turn me 21
5) And if he did anyway, at least make me prettier
6) Threaten my dentist to hasten up the braces process
7) Lose some 2 kg... (this doesn't seem to be happening)
8) Finish School
9) Confirm a place at CLEO
10) Decide which school I want to go to next

Oh shit.. not too few I see...........................

Better stop here before the stress builds up.

I'm gonna go to Church to pray that I pass.
Then later the temple.
Then the mosque.
Then.. more temples..
Then more churches..
Then maybe visit some cults.

Kidding!

Or am I??????

ZzzZ

2010-06-01T23:39:00.002+08:00

I realize I have really let this place go to the shits.

And I would like to use the excuse that I've got
a lot to do, and very little time. But the truth is that
I haven't been doing a lot, and I've been wasting time.

Except I've been wasting time -- happily.

So to all my other priorities, all I have to say is..
"Ah crap I'll get you done tomorrow!!!!!!!"

(truth is I might never get around to it. BUT I'll TRY!!!!)

Like this blog post. It's the epitome of effort right here.
And even if it's rubbish effort, I think it's still to be
appreciated. It's still EFFORT.

I mean midgets are half-sized people, but still people!
So are uglies. And so, if we, as society, can accept them,
this lousy piece of shit blog post can be accepted too.

I am going nowhere with this lah.
Just thought I owed it to myself to do some sort of
maintenance (and fail at it).

I think tomorrow is a good day for sleep. And so is the
day after that.. and the following weeks. Until June 14,
where I suspect another failure of a driving test is coming
up. Then I'll just die and sleep forever.

Depressing thoughts over!

Goodnight.

2010-05-15T10:10:00.002+08:00

I am going to do something about myself.

What it is -- I don't know.

But I would like to stop looking 16-18 for
awhile. Not that it is not flattering, I realize
that I am still unable to buy M18 movie tickets
and cigarettes if I did not bring an IC, and I half
like it because.. I like looking young...

STILL the thing is... I am quite tired of being hit
on by perverted old men.

I am 21! 21 2121 DAMN IT. I both relish and
hate saying it but DAMN IT I AM 21. I do not
appreciate any "hey do you still have your
school uniform" kind of comments and I am
officially grossed out. Maxed Grossed Out.

I do not know what I am supposed to do, really.
It seems that I am still as flat as when I was 13.
And I am still as short. Still as skinny (ok not really).
Still as blur-looking.

Oh crap -- I just realized why I do not attract
normal men.

Sigh, they say you have to take what you can get
right? I'm pretty sure I'd be quite wanted in Geylang
if I just went ahead and put on my St Nicks uniform
and stood around looking cock.

So sad - so true.

On Involuntary Hiatus

2010-05-13T14:50:00.001+08:00

Sorry I've disappeared.

The hiatus will probably continue for awhile.
Unless I feel less lazy/more guilty.

lollers

2010-05-05T10:15:00.002+08:00

I know I have a disgusting laugh.

Sometimes when someone tells a joke and
everyone bursts out laughing, the laughter
just starts to die off the moment I join in so
everyone can turn around and give me looks of

"What the fuck is that sound?"

And honestly, I never really pay attention or
care too much because there is no way people
can change the way they laugh!

(By laugh I mean the real FWAHAHAHAHAHA
kind, I don't mean the haha/hehe/hoho/giggle kind.)

Until this morning, at least.
When the most depressing thing happened to me.

A little background first:
1) My family has this thing, we attract ghosts.
2) Because my brothers (but not me) can see them.
3) So can my sister-in-law/aunties.
4) Paranormal shit always happens to us.
5) It's unfortunate. But also true.
6) Most of the shit happens to Gareth.

So back to the story, this morning at 1.20am, I
was watching Modern Family downstairs. I started
laughing, and around 30 seconds later, Gareth opens
up his door upstairs and shouts,

"WHO'S DOWNSTAIRS!?"

I didn't reply.. I continued laughing and he shouted
again, "WHO'S THERE!?!?!?"

I stopped laughing and said, "erm.. Sam?"
and he said, "Oh fuck. Okay nevermind."

At that point I was like SHIT SHIT SHIT did he see
something/hear something!?!?

And then I realized!!!!

it was me............................

Because Gordon also did the "WHO'S THERE!?"
thing to me before as well............................. T.T

WHAT THE HELL!! Is my laughter so disgusting!?
Even my mum told me at breakfast,

"Gareth was so freaked out last night lah, Mei.
Irene woke him up saying there was some creepy
laughter coming from downstairs. Even I myself didn't
dare go out of the room and Gareth did leh."

LIKE WHAT!? WHAT THE FUCK.
I know it's disgusting but it's not like Pontianak creepy!
I mean COME ON MAN. Fucking depressing.

Next time I go out I'm not gonna laugh anymore.
I'll just bring along some ROFL/LOL/LMAO/HAHA
kind of cards with me, and use them as a replacement of
my laughter.

I can only hope that such measures will work out, just
in case I attend any stand-up comedy shows and the
Ghostbusters bust in.

2010-05-01T23:54:00.002+08:00

What happened to all the good cartoons?

WHY WHY WHY is there shit like:

Edgar and Ellen
WINX CLUB
Shaun the mute dumb sheep
(and other crap I do not know of)

WHAT WHAT WHAT happened to:

HEY ARNOLD!
Daria
Freakazoid
Animaniacs
Rocko's Modern Life
Ren and Stimpy
Ahhh! Real Monsters
Akazukin Cha Cha
Samurai X
Arthur
Kim Possible
Recess!
Madeline
Looney Tunes
Pinky and the Brain
Beavis and Butthead

!?

WHY ARE THEY ALL GONE?

I sense that the crappy shows Disney's churning
out as a form of "protection" of today's kids against
vulgarities and obscenities are only making them
more retarded. Plus it's not like the surpression of
sexual innuendos and the like is really helping.

They ARE still making condoms for 12 yr olds in
Switzerland afterall.

I suggest we just stop the condom making and just
have better cartoon making.

Seriously. Stop Edgar and Ellen.
It's possibly the worst and ugliest cartoon I have
ever laid eyes on.

2010-05-01T12:12:00.002+08:00

Happy Early Birthday little Ling! :)

You are my soul sister.

ARGHHHHHFFFF

2010-04-22T10:08:00.004+08:00

It's been countless months and I still have not
created any sort of design for my tattoo.

Nor have I actually come up with any kind of cash.
Though in retrospect, of course, the design is still
a little more vital.

I've gone from wanting the cute kind of tattoo to meaningful
kind to religious kind to wtf kind to.. right now I'm not sure.

I've been looking through fuckyeahtattoos to no avail.
All I've seen are just perfect ways of getting fucked upside
down by people.

Either through:
"WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING??"
OR "WHY IS THERE A CUPCAKE ON YOUR LEG!?"

Actually those were my thoughts.
But we all know what goes around comes around.

Though I do not feel that guilty for laughing at people
who tattooed pastries on their body. I am almost 100%
sure those are fatties/inner-fatties.

Also, I laugh at people who try to justify their messed
up tattoos like this:

"I got LOVE in braille on my right wrist to symbolize that
love is blind."

Wtf? People are sure as hell not going to say,
"COOL!!! BRAILLE FOR LOVE!!! LOVE IS BLIND!?
WOW THAT IS SOOOOO WITTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

But they ARE going to say, "Why the hell do you have
so many moles on your wrist dude? You are like..
super cancerous or something."

Maybe I am being quite mean -- then again if I am
going to put something permanent on my skin, I am
not going to ini-mini-miny-mo my way through a
"100 WAYS TO NEVER GET LAID" magazine and then
head down to the nearest tattoo parlor near me.

Moral of the story: this thought process is going to take
quite long. In fact it might never end.

Ethics Exam

2010-04-19T02:34:00.003+08:00

REDBULL GIVES ME DIARRHOEA.

And I cannot live without it before an exam.
So basically, before a test/exam/assignment date,
you will always see me run to the toilet.

I don't know what else to do.
Maybe I should resort to studying much earlier,
quite a lot like what others seem to do.

BUT WHAT ABOUT SLEEP????? AND TV???

Anyway it doesn't matter.
Redbull can only keep my mind awake, but it seems
to do little for my short attention span. I've probably
spent 4 hrs on fb/blogs/geekologie and only 2 on notes.

You know what this means?

I've shitted before my test, probably will shit during
the test, and will get shit for my test.

Tomorrow's my Ethics Exam... and
all I can remember now is HITLER.

Honesty
Integrity
Trustworthiness
Leadership
Excellence (commitment to)
Reputation and Morale

So cool right. I am damn awesome at acronyms.
Sadly, this is all I remember out of the 10+ acronyms
I've created tonight. Its 240 so Imma go to sleep.

2010-04-18T19:42:00.002+08:00

I am the WEAKEST drinker ever.

I mean, I was always aware of that fact,
but yesterday just made me 100000 x more
cognizant of my supremely low drinking abilities.

But I had Ian, who by 1 1/2 bottles, started to
reveal what kind of bad liar he is hahaha.

Good times.

R(A) nights should probably happen more often.
Of course, perhaps we should choose better
locations; just in case any of us falls into a drain.

Insanity

2010-04-14T10:39:00.002+08:00

Oh crap......... I should never go
back to my old sites.

I always think they're just emo or
something and that is why I avoid telling
ANYONE about them, unless of course,
people already know which ones they are.

But just for fun, I went to check if my
OLDEST Blogspot still existed, and I sort
of regret finding out that.......... it does.

I'm not sure what creeps me out more.
The fact that I sounded retarded or that
I was most probably retarded. That, plus
my apparent inability to spell/type properly.

Eg. (please note that i did not edit ANYTHING)

"and i must say tt i actualli tink its not bad
w nmake up after all. hahaha. BUTCH LOOKS
SUPER GOOD IN IT. well, she has e eyelashes n all.
i haf like.... NOTHING?? so yeah, i tink being naturally
ugly migt be better. hahaha. MAGGY HAS BRACES.
wow. so a lil bit has changed. she looks... a lil weird i
must say. i dunno whyy, but a lil weird, and so, i dun feel
like weraing braces... maybe not straightening me teeth
is alright la horr.... errr.... yeahhhh....."

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?
Even I don't really understand my train of thought man.

And actually this is like 1/10th of the stupid post.
Which sadly means..... yeah that there is more of this
mindless blabber.

I don't really get how I had friends at 15.
Or how I managed to get A2s for English.

But I conclude that I am only human, and therefore
this should be quite forgivable. At least more forgivable
than the time I used to type like this:

"*~2 Be ToGetHeR 4eVerR~* LurBches YeWzSx"

As in I seriously thought I was BITCHIN' good at it.
I even compared how I capitalized better than other
people. This is a special kind of wtf.

If I ever wanted to tell stories to make my future
nieces/nephews really embarrassed by me, these
would probably be it.

I am sure I can think of some more.
But only so much lowering of the IQ can be done today.

2010-04-13T21:16:00.002+08:00

"Here's to me and here's to you,
and here's to love and laughter.

I'll be true as long as you-
and not a single minute after."

2010-04-08T17:57:00.002+08:00

I wonder if it is a bit disoncerting that I've
become so busy as of late.

Since Monday, well actually, cancel out Monday.
Oh wait, no I studied for Stats for 5-6 hours
and I ended up with what I can only assume
(with dread) is a D. or C-.

I do not appreciate any "look on the bright side,
you didn't get an F" comments. If you don't want
flying Fs at you, don't throw them to someone else.

Anyway, I've already worked 2 times this week.
And come Sunday, I would've worked four.
In total, I would've earned $450 dollars.

The saddest part is that I actually have 2 jobs.
One of which pays me $20 an hr -- $200/day.
and that's where my $400 comes from.

The other one gets me $50 after 2 days. If you do
the math, you will get:

$50 / 2 days = $25 a day = Wtf kind of job is this!?

The worst kind. And I've been barely able to keep my
eyes open. I know it's so boring to hear about work,
but it's really all I've been doing.

Oh, I've also been thinking of weird stuff.

Last week I went around asking if a person with AIDS
passed motion, and someone ate that motion, would the
AIDS infection pass.

This week, I started wondering about the song about
Abraham. You know, the "Father Abraham had 7 children..
7 children had Father Abraham..blabla.. and none of them
were bright."

Well technically you just insulted the children of a
great Biblical man. So.. is that blasphemy?????
Then again did Father Abraham have 7 children?

This is called self-mindfuck. I'm going to shower now.

Parents always win

2010-04-08T11:55:00.003+08:00

One day, a son asked his father for a new car.

His father said,
"Not until you cut your hair.
Also, your grades are terrible and you never
ever take time to read the bible. Until those
things are done, you will have no car."

So the son said, "fine."

And after a month, the son came back to
his father and said, "I've managed to get A's
for all the subjects I'm taking this term, and
I've been reading the bible every night. Can
I have a car now?"

And the father said,
"That's good. It's good to see you've been doing
so well. However, you still have not cut your hair."

The son, being very witty, shot back,
"Ah, but Dad, when I read the bible, Jesus
and Moses and Abraham allllllllll had long hair.
It's been decided long ago that long hair is cool."

The father smiled at him and said,
"Thaaaaaaaat's right. It is cool.
Also, if you noticed, they went everywere on foot."

"And that's how Sue C's it."

2010-04-08T10:11:00.006+08:00

"All I want is just one day
a year where I'm not visually
assaulted by uglies and fatties.

Seriously, Ohio, these retinas
need a day off. So here's the
dream, the Friday after Christmas,
which I have off, if you're hideous
stay at home.

Spend the entire day watching home
videos of a time when you weren't
too repulsive for me to ever want
to look at."

2010-04-05T19:16:00.002+08:00

I feel like I've started to neglect this space and
for that I'm quite sorry.

But I'M NOT SORRY that I've gotten time to actually
reach like 500+ pages of some tumblrs which are
super interesting -- yes I have no life.

I'd like to write about Confi but I'm not really one of
those play-by-play blogs which recount every single
aspect of every single thing. Anyway my memory is
not that awesome.

All I remember was feeling a sense of calm that I have
not felt for a long time, and that was pretty special.
I was also quite high for most of the night... I think.
And I was right that the holy oil would cause me to
break out across my forehead, because.. I did.

Somewhat.

I think pictures speak for themselves so once I get
them I will upload them I suppose. I keep saying I will
do things but I never do.... like pass driving, for one.

Okay I never actually said I'd manage that.

But I did say I'd get something churned out for my
tattoo and I still haven't even picked up a pencil.

It's a little frustrating, but come August I will be officially
done with school!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But till then I have no holidays so it's basically 4 straight
months of school everyday + work.

Sexcitement.

Decisions Decisions Decisions

2010-04-02T01:15:00.005+08:00

From:

"When you look back, there will be
things you will regret.

You made the wrong decision?

Wrong.

You made the right decision.

Life is about decisions.

1) Am I going to have the practical
car or the fast car?

2) Shall I go to college or get a job?

3) Will I have wine, water, or beer?

Whatever decision you make is the
only one you could make.
Otherwise, you would make a different one.

Everything we do we choose.
So what is there to regret?

You are the person you chose to be."

10 Things I Hate about You

2010-03-31T15:18:00.002+08:00

I hate the way you talk to me,
and the way you cut your hair.
I hate the way you drive my car,
I hate it when you stare.
I hate your big dumb combat boots
and the way you read my mind.
I hate you so much it makes me sick,
it even makes me rhyme.
I hate the way you’re always right,
I hate it when you lie.
I hate it when you make me laugh,
even worse when you make me cry.
I hate it when you’re not around,
and the fact that you didn’t call.

But mostly I hate the way I don’t hate you,
not even close --

not even a little bit --

not even at all.

2010-03-31T14:31:00.001+08:00

Eh how how how.
1989 was 21 years ago..........

I feel exactly how the frog looks T.T

2010-03-30T22:29:00.002+08:00

Facebook is seriously asking for it.

So I will upload two here first.
Others will be up soon. I think.

(D0n't complain about photo quality.
Your camera is better than my BB's one

for a REASON. Otherwise you just got conned
or your camera is from 2000.)

Fuck I'm getting lazier and lazier.

You should be able to tell by the length of my posts.

Can someone buy me the orthopedic chair thing

that supports the back and allows for better bone growth?

Ah fuck it I'll just lie on the bed.

On route to becoming hunchbacked when I'm 25? CHECK!

2010-03-30T09:14:00.001+08:00

This always happens during Glee :(:(:(

And the harrasser is always my dad :(:(:(
(be it through phone call/facetoface).

Oh My Dad!

2010-03-29T14:03:00.005+08:00

Teehee, getting ready for Holy Week.

Because I am trying to be a better person!
Note that "trying" is an operative word.

DON'T BE TOO HARD ON ME!!!

There's that line about throwing the stone first and all!!
(hell yeah I'm quoting the bible! -- somewhat)

Go for confession again, if you were thinking assholic things!

Which I bet you were.

Romain Laurent

2010-03-27T02:20:00.003+08:00

45 fucking degrees man.

Awesomeness.

Also, I sometimes feel this way.
Like I'm running in a bloody handicapped manner,
(I have not exercised for 5-6 years thank you)
and the shopping bags are a bloody nuisance.

I think I was supposed to type something emo
but then I made like a bridge and got over it.

2010-03-27T02:13:00.002+08:00

Women are like subway trains.

They are never on time,
you are always told to ignore the exterior
(even when the interior is still like crap),
they cost a lot to ride, and sometimes when
you suck it up and wait out the trip, you
realize that the damn thing is taking you
nowhere that you want to be.

Chanel 505 Particuliere

2010-03-26T10:44:00.003+08:00

I realize it's literally a shit-type color.
Still, I cannot help but want it.

And Singapore's apparently run out of it.

I think I should stop wanting things.
They either do not exist, they're all gone, or I
will never get it.

Eg.
3.8 GPA, Jim Sturgess, Hot Singaporean men,
and a driving license.

I'm going crazy in school!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I THINK:

2010-03-25T21:16:00.005+08:00

guys who wear white suits look like douchebags.

And chances are, they probably are.
I SERIOUSLY hate it when guys wear white suits.
I do not get the message.

What is wrong with a black suit?
What is wrong with looking normal?

The only thing I can assume is that these bunch
of white suit wearing guys think that being ordinary
is far too beneath them.

So they rather be extraordinary.

Extraordinarily cock-looking.

And I know this because Jude brought me to the OCS
social night, and all I could think of after talking to one
of the dudes (in a white suit, not the OCS suit) was:

"WOW I bet he's a douchebag."

I am actually still thinking about it. (as you can see)

I still cannot decide what's the worst part of it,
the fact that he had a pretty date, or the fact that she
is not very aware he might turn gay in 10 months time.

Plus, after hearing Jude's propaganda about how
guys from OCS are le cream of le crop, I cannot help
but wonder if Singapore is doomed.

But I shall not be too negative, because I got chocolates!!!!

Haha, very easily satisfied.

This blog post is about nothing lah, I just feel bad
I've neglected this place. I've been so busy with school
and it's not like things are going to change soon.. what with
MBS and internships all.

I am going to a corner now to cry.

2010-03-22T21:07:00.002+08:00

Good is

knowing

when to

stop.